Quartz is a towering figure from Marathon days of yesteryear, those
rugged days of yore when men were men and kids were men and hell even
the women were men. He was a man's man, a manly man. But Quartz was
a manly man even by the standards of those heady days. He was so manly
a man he man-handled Manfred Mann when he manned and managed that band.
Quartz stood 6 foot 10 and weighed 295 and everybody knowed you didn't
give no lip to big Quartz... this is where I hold out my hand for the
5 bucks... still waiting for the 5 bucks... OK, no 5 bucks??? All right
then cheapskate... However Quartz (who's real name is Inky P. Dorkypooter)
was never a sightly person, alas, one may even describe him as "bone
dog ugly". In fact his mug was disgusting enough that all the mice
abandoned his village, a 7 hut zit festering on the side of a wet mud
slide. His mother was the only Smurfette so who the smurf knows which
smurfing Smurf was his smurfing father. It warn't Pappy Smurf cause
he and Darth Smurf... Wait a sec! 5 space credits has just appeared
in my Bank of Lh'owon account!
Enough of that. If you are a regular in the world of Marathon you can't
help but know of Quartz, the leader of the project with the most name
recognition of the most famous Marathon scenario vaporware ever to not
grace your hard disk, Hoth!! Quartz almost went on to almost
help found Bungie.org with Steve Campbell and myself. I hope he has
better luck with women! Many were the times in old alt.games.marathon
that Quartz and I did hard science to learn the ins and outs, the quirks
and habits of Marathon while he and his team slaved away on Hoth. The
years of effort and learning were not wasted (nor entirely abandoned!).
Quartz can kick your ass just by slugging you with that portion of his
brain that holds things Marathon. Fear his might, dodge his frontal
lobes, watch his left.
Quartz has returned to the scene he did not entirely abandon in the
first place and is here to give you a piece of his mind. You will see
things here you didn't even know you didn't even know about! I hope
this section grows as this person seriously is a valuable contributor
to the genre that deserves more respect than he just got here, read
on and be amazed, entertained and educated all on the same page.
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